Laugh Or Throw Up?

Laughing and throwing up both require your core so this could be a good exercise for those of you, like me, that skipped your core workout yesterday (don’t worry I’m going to the gym this afternoon to get it in.)  As you know I love going to the site Food Republic.  Food Republic is a site for men who want to eat and drink well, and to live smart (their words not mine…..I’m not that smart) and I think I fit that mold.  There are always great recipes, ideas about food and drink and every now and then the article that just makes you want to laugh OR throw up.

Yesterday I was going through the site for the 5th or 100th time of the day and kept skipping this post until I finally decided to stop and read it and I could not stop laughing until I thought of the implications as well as future uses.  What am I talking about?  Read the article [HERE] or continue reading.  The concept of the article is lickable wallpaper.  You read that right.  Wallpaper that you lick to get a taste of, in this case, cake.  A company has put this wallpaper up in an elevator in London and is hoping to expand all over, including those of us on this side of the pond.

After I read it my first thought was laughter.  I remember sitting in the elevator uncomfortably as we went from the ground floor to the 100th floor packed in like sardines in suits and ties.  Imagining somebody just turning and licking the wallpaper and then exclaiming ‘I should never skip breakfast but damn that cake is so good.’  I would burst out in tears.  Or somebody licking the elevator wall when their boss walked onto the elevator.  How hilarious would that be?

Then my mind quickly raced to the hygiene of it all.  The article makes the claim that there is a person who removes the circle tab after it has been licked.  That is all well and good, but what if they miss that one lick and you lick the same spot.  Or if they accidentally remove the wrong tab?  They are human after all, and humans make mistakes.  Maybe they can event the disappearing tab, that when it gets wet it dissolves.  I don’t know but there has to be a better way than hoping the elevator man is paying attention.

Not one to leave well enough alone I wanted to expand this business.  Why limit it to elevators?  Why not airplanes?  Why not hotel rooms?  Think about the idea that when you book your hotel room they ask you what you would want in your room in terms of food and you got to choose peanut butter and jelly?  You telling me you wouldn’t be licking that wall when you first checked-in and the trip was stressful?  Better yet, why not add liquids as a choice?  A nice glass of  shiraz (although I don’t drink I think this is a good idea) that has all the taste, non of the sugar (we are triathletes watching our racing weight) and no side effects like a hangover?  The entire room doesn’t have to be covered but just a big enough area that is easily accessible by not only the guest but by hotel staff to remove the old paper and add in the new one.  They could even charge extra for additional sheets of ‘food.’

On the airplane, I bet more people would order this because it has to certainly taste better than the junk they serve on the planes these days.  And on those trips where the bag of pretzels that contains two pretzels can be replaced with a vegetable taco or for you carnivores a steak.  Imagine that for a moment……and how easy is clean up?  Its a sheet of paper so the effects on the environment are nothing.  The possibilities are endless if you ask me.




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  1. Bob says:

    I like the idea of eatable clothes better.
    I’m going to buy my eatable Speedo tomorrow..
    I wonder if I will have any “takers”……
    Bob recently posted..Perfecting IronmanMy Profile

  2. BDD says:

    I think I just earned a little bit of a pukie in my mouth reading that
    BDD recently posted..Off Season Report CardMy Profile

  3. Jeff Irvin says:

    Jeff Irvin recently posted..Time in the Saddle ….My Profile

  4. Natasha says:

    Haaa this has to be an idea for a novelty gift but surely they don’t actually think it would sell in public places. I wouldn’t lick wall paper in an elevator!
    Natasha recently posted..Winner, winner! and Go DAD!My Profile

  5. Jill says:

    For reals? This is actually sort of disgusting!
    Jill recently posted..Come run my long birthday run with me / Shoe winnerMy Profile

  6. Jen says:

    This is the most disgusting thing I’ve ever heard on on so many levels.

    #1. Just yuck.

    #2. I don’t care what the F they do – this is not sanitary or smart.

    #3. I would rather starve a slow death than lick a wall

    #4. I am SURE this is 100% chemicals.

    #5. Are we, as a society, so gluttonous that now to self-soothe ourselves in elevators and other spots that we have to continually engage our taste buds?

    OMG – stop the ride I want to get off… I might just throw up.
    Jen recently posted..Food for thought: Carbo-loading pre raceMy Profile

  7. I don’t know about tasty wallpaper, but if they come up with tasty toilet paper, I’m in.
    Shut Up and Run recently posted..Just a Little PrickMy Profile

  8. Christina says:

    “The shnozberries taste like shnozberries!” (Willy Wonka – best tasty wallpaper reference ever!) Think this would make more sense in your own home where you know who’s been licking. But in general – ewww!
    Christina recently posted..Katy Trail in the SunshineMy Profile

  9. HAHA!!!!!!!!!!! Honestly I’m not sure how to respond! LOL
    Mamarunsbarefoot recently posted..Sand CastlesMy Profile

  10. Chuck says:

    Hey bud, way to ball out this weekend!
    Chuck recently posted..HeadwindsMy Profile

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